So, the guy that did Beowulf and The Polar Express is producing another motion-capture movie… I haven’t had nightmares in years so why not?
Oh God, the eyes! They’re so dead!
The trailer has a couple of decent lines to start out with before giving up completely after about 30 seconds. Oh, and the creatures are unholy abominations, per the Zemeckis formula.
Beer Prediction
I’m not sure this one has enough ambition to deserve a full six-pack.
Kill The Irishman
Ropeofsilicon.com was so kind as to inform me that this one unites the director of The Punisher (2004) and the star of the remake (sequel?), Punisher:War Zone. Exciting. This flick is based on the real-life shenanigans of Cleveland’s most hardened gangster, which sounds pretty intense.
Only the second most intimidating Cleveland resident, though
The trailer looks like the star, Ray Stevenson, could turn in a pretty badass performance, and it’s nice to see the 1998 dream cast of Kilmer, D’Onofrio, and Walken are still ambulatory. Pay special attention to the explosion at 1:40… pretty sure it was done in MS Paint.
Beer Prediction
Hopefully this one does enough to get out of limited release… if not look for it at your nearest Redbox in a few months. Should be worth a rental.
Red Riding Hood
So, the directress of the first Twilight does a spin on the Little Red Riding Hood story in which a teenager version of that character falls in love with a wolf-man? If teenage girls are to be trusted, I’m pretty sure they already did this.
Shudder…
And… after watching the trailer, I can say that this looks even worse than I thought. I am looking for the erotic Gingerbread man thriller that’s sure next in line, though.
Beer Prediction
Will it be as bad as this? The track record says probably.
Battle: Los Angeles
Another special-effects laden alien invasion movie, except this time they forgot to write a proper title?
Worked so well the first time
Oh ho ho… my bad. This looks fuckin’ awesome. The Hurt Locker of alien invasion movies? Yes, yes please. Special kudos to the song choice, which would be unlistenable in any other context.
Beer Prediction
Since this is a trailer review, I’m going to have to give it only three beers. Okay, the trailer is A Toast through and through, but let’s hedge a bit and assume they play up the “this could really happen” angle a bit too much and fall short of brilliance in the script department.
No comments:
Post a Comment